23 Dirty Talk Phrases To Use In Bed, According to Sex Therapists

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Lastly, she warns against the use of disrespectful language or pressure, as this can take away from the experience entirely. She also advises people to stop things if they are unsure of the non-verbal or verbal reactions they garner from the experience. Stating that it is best to ask for clarification and consent if this occurs. “When learning to walk, we fall over, again and again and again, until eventually walking is easy.

Dirty Talking Doesn’t Have to Be Dirty.

What to say during sex and what to do during sex both have a lot to do with your partner and what they’re into. Remember that the same “lines” don’t work on everyone. For example, calling your last partner “Daddy” might have made him instantly hard, but your new beau might think of it as boner kryptonite.

Things She Really Wants To Hear When You’re Talking Dirty

“In a relationship, trust is incredibly sexy,” she finishes. Once you get a feel for the vibes, then it is up to you to choose how you wish to progress. The best dirty talk examples for starting out are those that maintain only a slight aura of sexuality to them that simply hint at the real thing, and are most effective when they aim to build anticipation. But how do you start the practice without feeling awkward or guilty for outwardly sharing your sexuality? First, openly communicate with your partner about your desires and why you’d like to begin the practice. If they are on board, then begin to ease into it.

• This month, they dive into why so many women get turned on by dirty talk.
• For me, it was on the playground of my elementary school, where a white girl–who I thought was my friend–called me the n-word when I refused to join her in a fight against a mutual friend.
• All you have to do is ask your partner if talking dirty is something that they want to experiment with, and if so ask them the kinds of things that they would enjoy hearing from your dirty talk.
• If you are doing a role play, these incorporated props can be used here too.
• Because when you’re in the heat of the moment, you’re totally free to push the envelope on just how dirty and intense you can get.
• I think dirty talk involves more trust and it takes a while for me to get there.

That check-in could include what you loved and what was really good as well as any corrections or minor adjustments if you have them. To take the guesswork out of what turns your partner on, Dr. Jansen says coupled clients can create “Yes, No, Maybe” fantasy lists as an exercise. Whether you complete the checklist on paper or use a questionnaire app like Spicer, it’s a great way to take inventory of your respective sexual fantasies, interests, and kinks, to then compare where they do or don’t align. This also helps to clear up whether what you both do or say going forward has enthusiastic consent. Keep the lightheartedness in your mind, and remember that you’re doing it because you want to spice up your sex life.

When it comes to your sex life, a little dirty talk will keep you and your partner from getting bored. Just like a show-stopping broadway belt, talking dirty takes rehearsals before hitting the stage. With a bit of practice, you’ll be a wordsmith of sexy talk that will drive your partner wild. The key to dirty talking without being cringey is to be yourself, says John Eros, audio erotica creator for ethical porn company Sssh.com. “If something doesn’t feel natural to you, it won’t sound right when you say it and it will come across as forced,” he says.

• It might be too off-putting or strange if you suddenly start sending him texts telling him that his cock is harder than any man’s you’ve ever seen.
• You’re communicating to a partner that you desire them, or you want them to feel good, or you want them to make you feel a certain way—and the dirty words and phrases are just a means to achieving that end.
• This can be really erotic and doesn’t require you to quickly recall phrases or scenarios.
• He wants to be able to give you pleasure and make you feel amazing.

Eros says incorporating dirty talk into phone sex is one way to get more comfortable with it. Hop on the phone while you’re masturbating, and describe what’s happening to your partner through voice or text messages; go step by step, and outline exactly what you’re doing, how it feels, and how it looks. “You’ll soon start to realize what kinds of words, phrases, or scenarios turn you on the most,” says Eros. You might whisper something in your partner’s ear in the morning and then send risqué text messages as the day goes on; as the anticipation builds, you can get progressively more suggestive.